Roe v. Wade was cut down today. Not just overturned, which to me sounds far too genteel for the reality which we now face, but cut down. Cut down, a sword has been plunged deeply into the hearts of all of us who feared this day.
I have been running from fiery fury to heart wrenched sorrow and worry. The future ahead looks much darker than a week ago. Not even 24 hours have passed and already there are mentions, loudly, of beginning the process of denying the access to contraceptives and the demolishing of equal marriage. Roe was like a barricade behind which many of the rights we fear to lose were defended. We have always worried about there coming a day when we’d see it fall. But I know I never thought we, the children and grandchildren of those who stood up and won this battle the first time, would see it be destroyed. I know my O’ma would be beyond enraged and indeed I feel those flames in my own soul. My instinct is to cut loose my temper and rage against every aspect of the injustice of this decision and the ones that are undoubtedly to come. But more than I want to let my fury burn, I want to look after my loved ones.
I am notoriously protective. I rarely fear and worry about myself, although I am on edge. Instead my heart is absolutely broken at the consequences that will follow. No one will be untouched by this decision. That breaks my heart. I cry not for myself, not yet, but for all of those who will suffer as a result of what has happened. I cry for the loss of life that will follow. What is proclaimed a pro-life decision will herald a rise in the mortality rate of expecting mothers, a rise in suicides, a rise in people feeling trapped in abusive relationships as custody battles grow uglier, a rise in starving children, a rise in abandoned children, a rise in people to discriminate against. There will be countless people who become victims of this systemic change. I weep because this won’t end with abortions being banned. It isn’t about lives but control. I weep for the children who won’t know love, the parents and spouses who will only know grief, and a nation that will inevitably be drowned in the cries of a people in pain.
It feels hopeless in this moment. A heavy darkness falls and the first crack of thunder that warns of merciless destruction shatters the silence. I find myself grasping for any shred of hope and courage. I don’t have any wise quotes from history to offer. However I can beg that we remember those who came before us. The people who took a stand when all hope seemed lost. The giants who rallied to overthrow injustice and see discrimination dismantled. They had immense strength and courage to drag our nation this far. I know that we too have the strength to rally together and prevent the destruction of all we hold dear. While we have yet to be a land of the free, I have no doubt that we are the home of the brave. The brave people of all genders, races, religions, sexualities, and ages who have laid down their lives since the beginning, paved the way for us today to be able to stand on their shoulders and hold fast in the face of the battles to come.
So today I like many will grieve. I will acknowledge my fears of the future ahead. I will let my rage cool from an unhinged fire into an ice cold steel, controllable. I will take today to regroup. Tomorrow though I will square my shoulders, breathe and tackle whatever comes next…