This has been an intense and distressing week. Mama is in ICU with sepsis. Today they took fluid off of her foot in 3 places. Tomorrow they test to see if it has entered the bones. While I feel as though I am drowning in fear, anxiety, and loneliness I have been constantly reminded that […]
The Greatest Blessing Read More »
Roe v. Wade was cut down today. Not just overturned, which to me sounds far too genteel for the reality which we now face, but cut down. Cut down, a sword has been plunged deeply into the hearts of all of us who feared this day. I have been running from fiery fury to heart
Unadulterated Rage Unbridled Sorrow Read More »
I like to think of myself as someone with the strength to keep moving forward towards my goals and dreams even when obstacles obstruct my path. But on days like today I feel so weak. I keep crying when I’m left alone to my thoughts. I feel ridiculous for being upset. Its no one’s fault
So most people who know me know that I have never liked most breakfast foods much less eating anything shortly after waking up. When I did eat breakfast it was always something super sweet and decadent. I still don’t like a savory breakfast. Recently though with my diet changes I decided I did need to
I am a child of a military family. A family that is so deeply rooted in serving and fighting that we know no other life than dedicating ourselves to fighting for and protecting others. Death comes for all, it is an inescapable aspect of living. Memorial day is a day to honor the dead who
This year seems to be a year for a lot of inward reflection and development. I gave up sodas for Lent and now I don’t miss them at all. It feels like that decision was a preparation for my new challenges. I’ve always had iffy blood pressure and racing resting heart beats. My cholesterol hasn’t
Continuing to Change Read More »
Since the dawn of time our world has been built on bloodshed. We are often reminded that many times it was a kill or be killed world. Where once we used weapons of stone made by hand now mankind carries weapons with far greater destruction made by machine. I would like to say that once
Yesterday I was on edge all day. I found everything irritating and got angry at the littlest things. It took ages of trying all the coping mechanisms I know except I forgot visualization. So when I remembered I started working through the exercise. It helped immensely. Of course it was amusing as I went along
I haven’t been awake very long and yet already I feel as though I cannot breathe. The walls feel like they are closing in around me. My anxiety doesn’t seem to even need a trigger to hit. I haven’t been awake long enough to have any had anything trigger this attack. I will probably be
Senseless Anxiety? Read More »
After 8 years of rage and distrust, finding serenity in Christianity still feels strange to my mind. Cleary my heart and soul are happy with the peace I am finding but after a life time of learning a God of wrath, anger and for lack of a better word bigotry the God I have come
Seeking Peace in my Soul Read More »